Mojo and the Mess

You know what’s worse than cancer? Fighting your insurance company while you’re fighting for your life.

Every scan, surgery, and medication I need has to be approved by people sitting behind a desk who have never met me. People who will never know what it’s like to wait for a phone call about whether you get to live or die. They hide behind phrases like “pre‑authorization” and “peer review,” while my clock ticks down.

I’ve had life‑saving scans canceled the day before because insurance didn’t “process the paperwork in time.” I’ve had medications denied because they “weren’t cost‑effective.” Do you know what it’s like to be told your life isn’t cost‑effective? To know that someone with no medical degree and no connection to your reality decided that you, your treatment, and your survival are just too expensive?

And the waiting—the endless, suffocating waiting—while cancer doesn’t wait for anyone. These delays aren’t harmless. People die waiting for approvals. That’s not an exaggeration. The system is set up this way: they drag their feet, hoping you’ll give up, miss a window, or not survive long enough to cost them money.

So what do you do? You learn to fight back, even when you’re exhausted.

I’ve had to become my own full‑time advocate. I’ve learned to:

• Call every single day for updates, even if they roll their eyes at me.
• Ask for case managers and supervisors instead of accepting the first “no.”
• Get my doctors involved immediately, because a physician calling can sometimes speed up the process.
• Demand written reasons for every denial, because it forces them to back up their decisions with actual facts (not just their bottom line).
• Keep meticulous notes about who I spoke to, what they said, and when—because “we never said that” is a game they like to play.

And let me tell you: it’s exhausting. It takes hours of my life I will never get back. It makes me feel like I’m begging for the right to survive.

I didn’t choose cancer, but I’m forced to spend precious energy fighting a system that treats my life like a financial liability. Cancer is already a full‑time job: appointments, treatments, side effects, hospital stays. Having to also fight an insurance company just to access the care prescribed by my doctors is cruel.

I know there are people who can’t advocate for themselves because they’re too sick, too overwhelmed, or don’t know how. And the truth is, the system counts on that.

But I refuse to let them silence me. Because if there’s one thing cancer has taught me, it’s that my voice is my greatest weapon.

So to every insurance company out there: cancer is brutal, but you’re worse. And I will keep calling, appealing, and pushing until you do your damn job—because my life depends on it.

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Cheat Sheet: How to Advocate for Yourself Against Insurance Companies

This deserves its own post because the system is set up to break you. Here’s what’s worked for me:

1. Call daily. Don’t wait a week to “check in.” Make yourself the squeaky wheel they can’t ignore.
2. Ask for case managers and supervisors. Frontline reps can only read the script. Push higher.
3. Loop in your doctors. A phone call or letter from a physician can escalate things quickly.
4. Demand denial letters in writing. They’ll have to explain themselves, and it creates a paper trail.
5. Take detailed notes. Write down every name, date, and word said. This stops them from gaslighting you.
6. Know your rights. Ask about appeals and deadlines. Use your state’s insurance commission if you’re stonewalled.
7. Never accept “no” as the final answer. Keep appealing. Keep calling. Keep pushing.

You shouldn’t have to do this when you’re sick, but until the system changes, your persistence could be what saves your life.