Letters From the Mess (Dog Edition)

Hi. I’m Mojo.

I’m a French Bulldog.
Technically, I’m just a pet.
But in this house, I am also:
– Head of Emotional Support
– Director of Bed Gravity
– Medical Alert Dog (self-appointed)
– CEO of Staring at Her Until She Drinks Water

And this is what a full day looks like when you live with a chronically ill human who smells like chemo, sadness, and peanut butter toast.


6:37 AM – Rise and Judge

Mom stirs. I am already watching her.

She hasn’t moved in hours. I’ve been perched like a baked potato at the foot of the bed.
She groans. I snort in solidarity.
We’re already tired and we haven’t even peed yet.

She says, ā€œToday might be a better day.ā€

I do not believe her.


7:12 AM – Pills & Panic

She takes her meds. The Important Ones. The ones that might work or might make her feel like roadkill. It’s a gamble.

I am nearby. Watching. Judging.
This is when I begin monitoring.
My job is to smell weird shifts in her energy and alert the husband if she starts slurring or going sideways.

She calls it ā€œalerting.ā€

I call it ā€œOh no, she’s doing the dying face again.ā€


8:30 AM – Bathroom Time (Team Effort)

She goes to the bathroom.
I follow. Obviously.
She says ā€œgive me some privacy.ā€
I pretend not to hear her.

She’s not allowed to be unsupervised.
What if she passes out on the cold tile again?
What if she drops a cracker?

These are things I must consider.


9:44 AM – Couch Mode Activated

We move to the couch.
She’s bundled like a burrito made of pain and regret.
I assume the position: wedged into her ribs, staring at her soul.

A nurse calls. She ignores it.
A friend texts. She doesn’t answer.
I judge her silently, then fart to remind her I’m still present.

It smells like solidarity.


11:06 AM – Crisis, But Make It Quiet

She tries to eat.
That goes badly.
There is a vomiting episode.
I supervise.
I do not flinch.
I never flinch.

I am the rock in the ocean of nausea.
I am also licking the salt off her knee.
This is medical.


12:42 PM – Depression Nap #1

She cries. Then passes out.
I lay beside her like a weighted meatloaf.
She twitches in her sleep. I twitch with her.
Our sleep is synced.
Our trauma is shared.

It is sacred.


2:15 PM – Attempted Productivity (Laughable)

She opens her laptop.
Says she might ā€œwrite something.ā€
Ends up watching 42 TikToks and crying over a frog who plays the piano.

I lick her hand and close the laptop with my body.
No work today.
Only survival.


3:57 PM – Afternoon Check-In

Dad comes home. He whispers, ā€œHow is she?ā€
I stare at him.
We both know what that means.

She says, ā€œI’m okay.ā€
We both know that’s a lie.


6:08 PM – Refusal to Eat Dinner (Again)

She sniffs her food like she’s in a cooking competition and someone just plated disappointment.
I offer to eat it.
She says no.
I bark once. It’s a compromise.

Eventually, she eats toast.
I am allowed a crumb.
We are healing.


8:36 PM – Cuddle Time (Critical)

She says, ā€œCome here.ā€
I do not hesitate.
She pulls me into her arms and sighs like I’m the only thing in this whole world that still makes her feel safe.

She’s right.
I am.


10:42 PM – The Blanket Shuffle

She tries to get comfortable.
Her joints hurt. Her stomach hurts. Her skin hurts.
She cries into my fur.

I don’t fix anything.
But I stay.

And that’s what makes me more qualified than half her medical team.


12:19 AM – Final Rounds

She finally sleeps.
I check her breathing.
I reposition myself for maximum contact.
My whole body wrapped around her like a warm, squishy life vest.

And even though I’m tired, I stay awake just a little longer.
Because she made it through another day.

And I was here for all of it.

—

Love,
Mojo 🐾
(Unlicensed, unpaid, and undefeated)

One response to “🐾 A Day in the Life of Mojo: Emotional Support Loaf, Snack Security, and Full-Time Shadow”

Leave a reply to mshibdonssciencelab Cancel reply

I’m Izzy

Welcome to mojo and the mess, This isn’t the blog I ever expected to write — but it’s the one I needed.

I’m Izzy, a twenty-something living (and dying) with terminal cancer, navigating the messy, heartbreaking, unexpectedly beautiful in-between. Here, you’ll find raw reflections, real talk, dog snuggles (shoutout to Mojo), and the unfiltered truth about what it’s like to face the end of your life before it really got going.

This space is for the ones who’ve felt forgotten, the ones who don’t know what to say, and the ones who are still holding on. It’s not always pretty, but it’s always honest.

Thanks for being here. You’re part of the mess now — and I mean that in the best way.

Let’s connect